Thursday, October 20, 2011

conversation part 2 contd...

Aka X : But me to bhai nahi hoo...:P
Me : Ajkal log social network profile to banate hai but social hona pasand nahi karte. Only one question ? Why are you on social network?
Aka X :nhi social or prsnl m ajkl ek bhut thin line reh gyi hain  me use cross krna pasnd nhi karti
Ok lets start something interesting...
Aka X : HMM.. whats interesing and what to do start??
Me : replace me on your place and you on my place and lets talk
Aka X : Na ise rehne dete hai...n wo blog pr jo poem thi wo achi thi..
Me: na na muje dekhna hai how you talk with a girl if you were boy
Aka X : wid a grl???? ok lets c start..
Me :Yes..
but me start nahi karunga ku ki me ladki hoo or  ladki kabhi age hoke bat nahi karti :p
Aka X: nhi maine to kiya tha :P:P frnd request bejhi ...pic per cmnt bhi kiya..
Me : exception are avialable
Aka X : Thanku :d
Me : Now back to point and start conversation..
Aka X:  ok
    hi Aka ...actuly tis is so funny
Me : Yes, I know but dont break we will taste just 5 minutes and will find all answers...what a boy or girl think about each other when they start conversation first time...
Aka x : to y tis is wid me only...
Me : Sari ramayan upar hai why only with you...
Aka X : acha :D
Me : Daat ku nikal rahe ho abhishek
Aka x : aise hi ek jock yaad agya :P
Me :  oh, tum kisi joke se kam ho kya
or Ladke reply karne me itna time nahi be fast
Aka X :  oh tumhe kaise pata...mujhe kab sun liya tumne ??
Me : Sunna kya hai jagat jahir hai...
Aka X :  (main apne ek frnd s bhi chat kar rahi hu)
oh mere jagat main to tumne aj hi entr kiya fir jagat jahir kaise..
Me : acha mene tumhare bare me suna hai and added you in my list..
Aka X : acha vaise kya suna hai mere bare me...
Me: Yhi ki tum fb par ladkiya dundh rahe ho...LOL
ku apna time barbad kar rahe ho dude..
Aka X : Are fb to free time me use karte ho time barabd kaisa?
Me : acha but tum to pure din online milte ho jab bhi me online ati hoo.
 or kuch kam dham nahi hai kya tumhe...
Aka X : ha mera office wi fi h to on rakhta hu sare mail ac
Me : acha...aisa kaunsa office hai tumhara..
or office me fb use karte ho ya kam karte ho
Aka X : ajkal sare offices aise hi hote h...e1 houses..dont u know tis??
online hone ka matlab ye to nhi ki use karta hu
Me : ohh...I dont know it b4 thanx tumne bata diya aaj
Aka X :  welcome dear..
Me : acha or kitni ladkiyo ko bewkoof bana chuke ho aisi baate kar karke..
Aka X : tum ban gai kya ..
Me : acha ...tumhe kya lagta hai..
or tum itna bak bak kyu karte me bhi itna hi bolte honge..
Aka X: main bewkuf nhi banata bt ab tum ban gyi ho shayad tbhi tumhare mind m aayi bat..or rahi office ki bat to vaha mind bolta hai...
Me :  oh mind..acha vo hai kya tumhare pas ...
Aka X: acha c ye 5 min se jyada ho gaya hai ab...
Me : yes, break it now...
so I think now you realized that ek ladke ke pas kya kuch hota hai..bolne, puchne or kehne ko...
Aka X : Bahutt...kuch..

to be continued.........

Posted on by Abhishek Jain | 2 comments

conversation and funny fight Part 1

A  funny conversation held between me and  Aka X ( female)  before two days ago. Aka X added me in her friend list by recommendation of one of my more thing Aka X and me belongs from same religion :

Aka X :  Hello
Me      : So lets intro first. I dont know abt you..
Aka X :   Vaise apne meri sarin info friend request accept karne se pehale dekh hi li hogi...I guess
Me : hehe LOL :D
Aka X : to fir ?? :(
Me : Ok back to tp ..tell me about your family background?
Aka X : Explained in 3 and 4 lines...
Me : Anything else which you want to tell me about your family...
Aka X : y humesha me hi apna family background bata chuki ur turn to say something abt u...
Me : I started to tell abt me...
Aka X :  (Beech me tokte huve) acha...waise ye sab kyun pucha or bataya ja raha h...mujhse shadi karne ka irada h kya :P
Me : Aisa mene kaha to nahi ki mera irada you se shadi karne ka hai ..
Aka X : Aaj tak fb par kisi ne mujse  family background nahi pucha...tum kaho to bio data or kundali bhijwau kya ??? 
Me : yahi to problem hai .. 
  • ladki ko bf ke bare me pucho to..use lagta hai ..ladka line mar raha ha
  • family ke bare me pucho to shadi ki soch raha hai.
  • padhai ke bare me pucho to lagta hai jealous ho raha hai..
    Aka x : or....
    Me : or kuch normal ya funny bat karo to...ladki ko lagta hai banda serious nahi hai...
    Aka x : or...
    Me : Ek no. ka luccha hai...fb par pakata hai..blah..blah...
    AKa X: or...
    Me: or kya mera sar or mera kan..
    Aka X : :D :D :D :D
    or tumhara muh jo bhi bhut chalta h :P
    Me: Use chalna hi chahiye...bhagwan ne muh diya hi do kam ke liye hai..
    1. Khane ke liye
    2. Bolne ke liye
    Aka X : acha..:P
    Me : Yes, Right to speech LOL
    Aka X : actuly...mujhe itni jaldi logo s opn hone ki adat nhi h...isliye..itni jaldi details dena kisi ko apne bare m ajeeb lagta h
    Me: To mene tumhe open hone ko kab kaha :D ?? par..muje to.. muje detail dena kuch jyada acha lagta apna biodata sath lekar chalta hoo :D :D
    Aka X: haan vo to samaj gai...
    ME :raste me har jagah jo bhi milta haiuse de deta hoo....
           le bhai...I am single Teri behan, sis, or beti kya milegi ready to mingle ...:D oh my god zukerberg sucks invented  facebook where people never face  books :D

    to be continued ....

Posted on by Abhishek Jain | 2 comments


Scene 1:
At the local Shiva temple today, a 4-year old came face to face with a statue of Nandi (Bull). After staring at the statue for 5 minutes, he made some courage and touched the bull on the nose. He then ran back a few steps and stood scared looking at the bull, expecting it to follow him.

After 2 mins, he again approached the bull from the side, touched it and ran away. This continued for the next 10 mins, till his mother pulled him away. Evidently he was a little too slow to realize it was a statue :)

Scene 2:
On my way back home, saw my neighbors kid on the roof of a car. As I stared at him from a distance, he got down and stood silently at the side. The following conversation ensued:

Me: Kyun chade the upar? Gir jate to?
Kid: Bhaiya wo car aapki hai?
Me: Nahi
Kid: To aap kyun poochte ho

Me: Stunned :(

Scene 3:

On the way up the stairs, one 5-year old to another, “Hey kal chutti hai na. Thank God!!!”. And to say we grown ups are frustrated :D
Posted on by Abhishek Jain | 2 comments

Monday, October 17, 2011

How to get the Facebook timeline (Awesum hack by me)

Get Facebook's New Timeline Beta Right Now

Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg announced a complete reconceptualization of profile pages on the popular social network with the introduction of Timeline. As Zuckerberg puts it, Timeline is the story of your life.

Gone is the single column wall of posts with the most recent updates telling '15 minutes of your story.' Instead, as the name suggests, you'll see a timeline of life events containing photos and other updates that stretches back to when you joined Facebook. Anyone viewing it can click back to any year where there are updates and see what was going on.
Facebook automatically selects the most important updates and highlights them with a blue dot. Grey dots represent hidden updates that might not be as important. Users can arrange their Timeline however they see fit by removing certain updates or highlighting others that might be important to them. The feature will begin rolling out to the public over the next few weeks, but developers can sign up for early access now. Here's how you can get it too:
1. Visit the Facebook Developer page and enable it for your account. 
 2. Click the 'Create New App' button on the top right. On the New App prompt window, give your app a display name and name space -- any name, it doesn't matter. Agree to the Platform Privacy Policy and click Continue. You will need a verified Facebook account so make sure you have either a credit card or phone number on file. 

3. After clearing the CAPTCHA verification you will then be taken to your new apps' settings screen (if Facebook doesn’t put you there automatically hit the Edit App button on the top right). Next, click on Open Graph link in the left column and define an action for your new app on the right pane. You can enter whatever you like; I wrote watch on the first field and chose video from the drop-down menu on the next one. Click "Get Started."

That's it! You may see an error telling you that something went wrong but just ignore that and head to your Facebook homepage, you should see an invitation to the new Facebook Timeline Beta (you may have to wait a few minutes). Once you are in you can take a short tour of the new timeline view or start editing your profile until you are ready to publish it.
The timeline functionality isn't compatible with the "old" Facebook, so most of your friends won't see your fancy new page just yet. Users will be migrated over the coming weeks as Facebook rolls out the update to everyone.
The new Facebook site looks gorgeous, but going beyond pure aesthetics, opening up more about your life to your social circle and potentially to the web?

 The top portion of the timeline features a configurable background picture called the Cover, and has personal information on the left along with your friends, photos, and Likes.

Posted on by Abhishek Jain | 3 comments

Sunday, October 16, 2011


हंसते-हंसते अचानक रुका !
किसके साथ मैं क्यों हंसा !
ये मेरी शक्ल कैसे !
ये मेरी कलम कैसे !
ये मेरे मित्र कौन !
ये मेरा शरीर कैसे !
ये मैं ज़िन्दा कैसे !
ये मेरी आँखें कैसे !
ये मेरा घर कैसे !
मैं तो इधर गया था
हाँ इधर !
तो मैं उधर कैसे !!
Posted on by Abhishek Jain | 2 comments